Sometimes I rugby, other times I cycle. Sometimes I lawyer, other times I cook. ALL times I cuddle the cute fluffies | Let me feed you @eat.khorak
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The Saturday Farmers' Market at @sattarbukshcafe is one of the highlights of my weekends. Qamar Zaman of Orchard Scheme Farms has some of the BEST produce in the area. Hit him up for all of your vegetable needs! That derpy second photo is to prove that I actually enjoyed myself.
Also I'm going to continue shamelessly plugging @eat.khorak because that's where this produce is going.
#PermanentRestingBitchface #ImHappyISwear #SupportYourLocal #Beardgame
. | @hizbarhayauddin
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When camps for the Asian Champs were announced a month ago, I spoke with the secretary, and two vice-presidents of Pakistan Cycling, requesting that I be allowed to stay and train in Islamabad during the week (the velodrome is 5 hours away). I had various professional commitments including an immigration case and business-related meetings. I explained my coach's training and nutrition plan, outlined targets, offered to attend the camps every weekend and whenever I could during the week, and committed to paying my own travel costs. All three of them agreed, unequivocally. I know this because I called each of them separately and asked them to repeat it in their own words. I attended camps and clocked in times 0.4-0.6” faster than the other guy trying out for Man 1. My best performance was 25”, while his was 25.9” (for reference, the difference between 1st and 12th place in the f200 was 0.37” so 0.9” is huge). A week before we were due to depart, an insider friend told me that I had been removed from the squad (no official correspondence thus far). When I called the higher-ups, they claimed my competitor had been putting in better times than me. I asked for the timings, they said there were no records of those attempts. I offered to drive to the velodrome that day and put in a better time, they said that timings weren’t the only consideration and that camp attendance mattered. I reminded them of our agreement – one of them admitted that he lied and taunted me saying that there was nothing I could do about it. The gist is the guy they picked is from the same province as the president + secretary, and it looks good for them if they’ve got provincial representation on the national team. The other team members were from Army and utilities departments, so I was expendable.
Of course, what good is my word, when you’ve got numbers. I drove to the track this weekend, and without warming up (after a 5 hour drive), unshaven legs, no aero wheels, and on a windy AF outdoor track, tied my own PB. Grab a stopwatch, time it for yourself, and tell me if it’s faster than 26 seconds (what team PK posted at the champs). #wymtm #FromWhereIRide
This is one of my favourite things about national teams and sports in general. Last month this guy and I were literally butting heads for bronze in the sprint at Nats and now we're working on our team sprint chemistry for Asian Champs next month (nothing like am ogre breathing down your neck to make you ride faster). Off the bike slash when he's not trying to rip your legs off during a race, "Dungar" (Ox) is one of the sweetest and most humble guys ever.
#TriedToSneakAMassiveBiteOfAppleBeforeThePicture #OnlyMarginallySuccessful #TrackToTokyo #BeardGame #FromWhereIRide #Swolemates
That awkward moment when your spotter forgets your safe word and you both almost die.
#ApparentlyIDontEvenLiftBro #GuessIShouldHaveStoppedAtPB #CouldHaveBrokenHisFace #WhereWouldIFindANewOneOfThoseOnSuchShortNotice #ClockedHimInTheEyeToo #TrackToTokyo #Swolemates #GymLife #MoreLikeGymNearDeath #BeardGame
The Brothers Hayauddin (@kaisarz88 is an adopted member) present: "Upper Class Humour" (aka a guide to entertaining yourself at a wedding where you don't know anyone). #WeTakeBookings #JustFeedUs #ExpectingACallFromChannel4Soon #IsThisNotHowBritishComedyWorks? #TheseTalentedDreamboatsAreAllSingleBtw #BeardGame
Nationals log, Days 4: The final day began with an interview, where I spoke for about 8 minutes and they only aired 6 seconds. Literally, they used one sentence. Not cool considering it was a diatribe about how we need more support for women's sports. In hindsight, that's probably why it got cut. They also made me wear a helmet because that's obviously the mark of a true cyclist. But it meant that I shaved my head for nothing that morning...
I lost my bronze final at the line so ended up 4th in the sprint. Not ideal but the guy I was up against was a beast so the fact that we went toe to toe was good enough for me. Finally got a chance to give back to my awesome support team though by being Waseem's holder for the elimination race, which was really just me sitting in his rear wheel while we waited for it to start. I also accidentally turned his GoPro off when pushing him across the line, so he didn't get any race footage either. Clearly, I'm very good at this... The last order of business was the Keirin, already a landmark event as this was the first time a keirin has ever been raced in Pakistan! I got boxed in going into the final lap but saw the tiniest of gaps and threw my handlebars through it to get some space and wind up third across the line. I think if i had geared up, I could have had the win, but that's just the nature of racing. It meant that I got a bronze medal and stood on my first podium at an A race! 4th, 4th, and 3rd, while jetlagged, ill, and on a completely alien track is far better than I could have expected for my first national championships. It also means that having only been riding for 9 months, I'm knocking on the big dogs' door and a contender for next year. I'm exceptionally grateful for all the support I've received from all of you, and will be throwing out a few specific mentions on Facebook.
Of course, being the poster boy for PCF meant stealing ALL the banners featuring me. Hit me up if you want an enormous poster of yours truly.
#GenuinelyTheBestDayEver #NationalChampion2018 #YouHeardItHere #NowForAWeekendOfNothingButPizzaAndVideoGames #wymtm #FromWhereIRide #BeardGame #TrackToTokyo
Nationals log, Days 2-3: First order of business yesterday was the f200, made all the more stressful because there were at least 5 guys faster than me in training and only the top 4 riders would qualify. I felt like I messed my line up in t3, but the team came running over and were like "you've got twelve seven!" which made my heart sink because the other guys were clocking 12 flats and below in training. When I relayed this to my manager, he replied "Not 12.7 dude. 12.07!" which was the best run at that time. The next 15 minutes were some of the more stressful ones I've experienced as I had to watch 7 other riders try to beat my time. Fortunately, only two of them succeeded and it meant that I qualified for the semis in my first ever nats!! I decided to have a crack at the team sprint as well, just to see how my standing lap compared to the other guys. We never stood a prayer of competing but why not, right? I ended up clocking the fastest time of the day and broke my own PB from Monday's kilo attempt, which I'm pretty sure is the new track record. (The first lap times are the bottom most ones in that second picture, and mine is on the top left). Challenge time: using my proprietary recovery formula, try calculating the amount of work I did on the day! I got fruit so I could feel better about how much chockie milk I've been drinking cuz that's how diets work.
Today's semi was a fiasco, because I a) didn't quite have the legs I needed, and b) screwed up horrendously from a tactical perspective. One of the major downsides to having virtually zero race experience (although there's *plenty* to criticise in hindsight). I figured out a strategy for the next heat, only to be informed that it was single elimination. Big wtf... Valuable learning opportunity and I still get to compete for bronze tomorrow, so not the worst day ever. There also seems to be a separate competition going between my mother and aunt to see who's my biggest supporter. Regardless of whomever prevails, I feel like I'm the real winner in this situation. #BestSupportTeamEver #DoubleNationalRecordHolder #StillCantWinADamnRaceTho #FromWhereIRide #wymtm #BeardGame
Nationals log, Days 0-1: We managed to catch the last seats on the last train out of Islamabad (after which they shut the stations down and literally blocked Lahore off) thanks to my dad being a BALLER and pulling some strings with the railways' Big Bosses. Attached is his tearjerker of a text, even more special if you knew how gruff he is . Clearly, Haroon Bhai and I are old men, because we fell asleep within seconds, much to our teammates' delight.. I woke up today feeling death, after a night of fever dreams, migraines, and sinus congestion, and very nearly considered skipping today's event, the Kilo. Then I read this text from Skeendog and remembered that fundamentally, I'm just that kid who likes to go fast. Had a crack at the Kilo, rode what felt like the worst effort of my life, and barely completed the third lap. When the results came in, a surge of people started commending me on my ride. I had tied the lap record on my first lap, was half a second up on my second, and then died a painful death to finish fourth overall. Milliseconds separated 2nd-4th and I'm confident that on a slightly easier gear, with more practise on this specific track, and in better health, I could've smashed it. So yeah, missing the podium by inches sucks, but on the balance of things, it was a pretty epic first day.
Since I love you guys, I'll share my proprietary recovery formula: r = (L)M + (E)C whereby you have a Milo for every lap of effort plus 1 chocolate for each event you've partaken in.
Also, apparently I'm the face(legs?) of Pakistan Cycling! #IGenuinelyHaveTheBestSupportTeam #ThatHelmetMakesMeSoPhotogenic #ImWearingItForever #TrackToTokyo #Nationals2017 #TeamHamza #ComeOnGuysGiveMeSomethingHere #BeardGame #wymtm #FromWhereIRide
National track championships from Monday. Still recovering from a nasty bout of illness (think it's Japan withdrawals), severely jetlagged, half of Pakistan is under lockdown, and we're taking the midnight train because all the roads are blocked. All of which just makes it that much more of an adventure!
#ITriedPackingLight #Honestly #LetsBringHomeThatGreenJersey #PrayForMe #NoSeriously #ChasingTheOlympicDream #GoLegsGo #TrackToTokyo #TeamHamza #StillDoesntSoundRight #StillTakingSuggestionsOnThat
Captain's log, Day 12: Yesterday was the last day of camp - a testing session in which we had a flying 200 and kilo, both electronically timed. My previous PB was 12.29 a month and a half ago so I was aiming to go sub 12, but was really hoping to beat the Pakistani record of 11.81. I paced the perfect wind-up (Albin would have been proud) but my front wheel slipped halfway through turn 1 and in trying to avoid wiping out, I took the worst line imaginable (about a foot above the pursuit line) and didn't straighten up until the start of turn 3. I was already committed to the effort so I powered through and clocked an 11.79 but I *knew* beyond a shadow of a doubt that I had a better ride in me. I politely demanded a second attempt after the remaining riders' efforts (so about 8-9 minutes to recover) and the coaches agreed. Tried some zen breathing and power poses to find a second wind (time goes by *really* fast when you don't want it to). The wonder woman pose makes you feel AWESOME though! It felt like time slowed and I actually engaged with every pedal stroke, but what really matters is that I smashed out an 11.67 - a 0.6 second improvement over my PB and made me the Pakistani f200 record holder! It also suggests I could have been even faster with fresh legs!
When the coaching staff learned I was a cook the first day, they joked about having me run the end-of-camp bbq. A fortnight later, much to everyone's amusement, I lasted all of 3 minutes before taking charge of the grills but it let me ply Saito-san (a big boss at the Japanese Keirin Association and school) with extra beef in hopes of currying favour. Jokes aside, in re. yesterday's post about asking questions, the man spent over an hour patiently answering all my queries and giving me details on how to apply, what determines a strong applicant, what my priorities should be, and insights into the life of a keirin racer. I feel extremely privileged to have gotten this opportunity can't express the gratitude I feel for all the support everyone's given me, especially you guys. Thank you. *cue dramatic music*
This will probably be the last log entry. If you're reading this, good luck and godspeed.
Captain's log, Day 11: Yesterday was our penultimate day of camp, and the only thing on the docket was an individual pursuit, or as I like to call it, 337 seconds of pure hell. I've been kicked in the crotch and enjoyed it more. It was also my second ever time using aerobars, and I fiddled about on rollers for about a minute trying to dial in my position before just accepting that physical discomfort is who I am now. All I have to say about it is that it understand why they call it a pursuit - because you're chasing your own death! If you know any pursuiters, stage an intervention because they're partaking in seriously unhealthy behaviour. Looking at you @tomsimpsonphoto We were rewarded for our suffering by getting to spend a day at the cycling oriented theme park built around the velodrome, so I took to trying ALL the kiddy bikes out as active recovery. There were some truly amazing ones and I'm livid that my phone died as it deprives you of of the sheer abundance of ridiculous contraptions on offer. There was also a roller coaster and a merry-go-round, which we rode multiple times. I'm a 28 year old man and feel no shame at this admission.
The short distance team was back from the world cup, which meant I got to meet Yudai Nitta before he beasted it on the boards. I've found that just approaching people and asking questions is the best form of education I've gotten, because almost everyone seems to be willing to reciprocate if you engage them. It's probably also because they're so far out of my league that I'm not a threat, but literally everyone I've talked to has been surreal-y helpful.
Speaking of, if anyone wants to offer tips on how I can look less like Quasimodo on aerobars, I'm all ears.
Stay tuned for today's update (warranted its own post hence the dearth of pictures in this one). We got to ride in the back of the cargo truck on the way back from dropping all the bikes off at the storage unit, which was way more fun than you'd expect (see my comment about being a grown ass man above). #SorryNotSorry #SorryIPursuitedTho #SeriouslyWTF #WhyWouldAnyoneDoThatToThemselves? #PainFace #TrackToTokyo #FromWhereIRide #BeardGame #wymtm
Captain's log, Days 10: Yesterday's spectacular sunrise belied the fact that it would be the most painful day on her bike yet. My body was fried from the day before, and we had to do a proper kilo, with a standing start and everything - which again, is fine, but Skeendog had me doing it on a 108" (have I mentioned how weak I am? It bears repeating). The good news though is we got a SLICK set of wheels to do our efforts on, so naturally it was photoshoot time. We had two f100s in the a.m. Sesh to break the wheels in, which I almost did literally when I clipped the cote d'azur entering turn 2 (the distinct bang sound). Managed to stay upright but I swore really loudly. Still clocked PBs at 5.76 and 5.74 though. The afternoon kilo however was DEATH (also only my second ever kilo). I have a Pavlov's dogs-esque relationship with the starting bell, as I go lactic whenever I hear the countdown. I was gassed by lap 1, contemplating quitting by lap 2, thought I might have peed myself on lap 3, and genuinely may have cried a little bit on lap 4. Managed a PB though with 1:10.76 on drop bars, including a 19 second starting lap and 35.5 second 500 (which was only 3.5" slower than Perko doing 500s on the same gear - because we're twins) so pretty pleased with that, because I'm fairly confident that I could do it faster on a normal gear and with fresh legs. Also, it means I satisfy the physical requirements to get into the keirin school and now just need to learn Japanese!
They tried to starve me to death again as this high fat low carb diet means I could eat about a quarter of that meal. But it meant I could make up for it by having this Kirin ice cream which is literally just a hunk of frozen cream cheese on a stick (the diet has its perks). Pro tip: Ice cream while soaking in a hot bath is among one of the better feelings in life.
Fanboying aside, can I just reiterate how cool these pros are?! I got to sit track center and discuss gearing, training tactics, and generally shoot the breeze with Shane fricken Perkins! WHAT?! #WereBros #EveryDayIsManCrushMonday #EveryDayIsLegDayToo #TotallySawMyLifeFlashBeforeMyEyes #TrackToTokyo #wymtm #BeardGame #FromWhereIRide
Captain's log, Day 9: This will be a eulogy. Yesterday entailed two flying kilos on 108" and I died after each one. Weirdly, despite the fact that I was empty about one lap into the second effort, my legs felt as if they were actually burning inside, and I was pedalling blocks (because even squares is too defined a shape for what I was turning), I had the exact same time for both efforts. The human body is a strange thing because I was convinced I'd be 5-8 seconds slower during the second run. Neither of those photos are staged btw, I was more lactic than a gallon of milk and the gurney was calling my name. I never stood a chance and was out within minutes. The second effort fried me so much that I collapsed right next to the bike stands and used a bike blanket as mine own.
When I came to, it was to discover the legend himself, @perkoperkins trackside ( #mancrushmonday ), which confirmed my suspicion that I was either dreaming or in heaven. That's him on the right, I know it might be hard to differentiate because we're twins. It's still astounding how down to earth and helpful these guys are, and he's the second Olympic god to encourage me to pursue the dream.
The afternoon session entailed smashing heavy weights in the gym for the second time in almost two months, which means I will be unable to function for the rest of the week. Since I have washboard abs, I was excused from the core workout* and amused myself by seeing how many shoes I could balance on Miho's back (8, until she collapsed in a fit of giggles and ruined my record attempt). I did get my own epic stretch session from Noda-san, whose hands are soft and strong at the same time and he's a true gentleman who didn't mind my dirty feet (I lifted barefoot). Also I'm in love with this mechanical bull machine they have at the gym. I think it's to stimulate recovery. All I know is I need one. *I wasn't excused from core work. I was tooling around in my time between sets. I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of said abs.
#INeedAMassageSoBadly #EverythingHurts #AndICantFeelThePartsThatDont #StillBestDayEver #TheOlympicDream #IfItDoesntKillMeFirst #TrackToTokyo #BeardGame #FromWhereIRide #wymtm
Captain's log, Days 7-8: I swear it's as of the Japanese have heard I'm trying to minimise Carbs and are intentionally attempting to sabotage me. I've finally managed to convey that I don't want rice with my food so they've stopped serving it to me (which still gets me weird looks at mealtimes). I also had a culinary epiphany today. I'd taken to sprinkling this delicious but very strong seasoning sachet onto my food at meals, and one of the Japanese riders gleefully informed me that I was supposed to mix it with hot water i.e. I've basically been eating raw bouillon for a week. Of course, I couldn't seem like a *total* idiot, so I explained that I was a cheffu and it was a gastronomic experiment.
We had our first roller session and these rollers are amazing; they put kreitlers to shame. The drums are massive and you can spin up ridiculously high cadences. Of course, I AM an idiot and forgot my garmin in Pakistan so I've done this entire camp without any data, but I'm confident I hit a PB for cadence. The highlight was seeing this prosty used as a water bottle holder by one of the Japan Para riders, which positioned it perfectly for her to reach for from the aerobars. Humour aside, we've been training alongside the Japanese para squad and it really gives you perspective when you think you've emptied the tank and then see someone do the EXACT same thing, put in a comparable time to yours, but do it literally one-legged. It's humbling and inspiring, and they don't get nearly enough appreciation or kudos for it. So if there's anything you take away from this post/these updates, it's that the stuff I'm doing is nothing compared to what these athletes put in day in and day out. Their motivation and drive demands our respect, and it's important that I posit that.
Also the Izu Velodrome seems to be competing with the Keirin School at keeping people out. And an artsy picture of the evening sky to distract from the fact that my standing lap times are the same on 88" as they are on 120". #SoClearlyTheresASweetSpotSomewhere #OrImJustMediocreInEveryGear #SomeoneHalp #TrackToTokyo #FromWhereIRide #wymtm
Captain's log, Days 5-6: Recovery day, which was disturbingly active considered all I wanted to do was lie on the couch nursing a bottle of Calpis (it's this probiotic soda and I'm convinced it's healthy so I can indulge). Shuzenji is a spa town built upon a series of hot springs and has these little foot soak stations scattered about, so naturally I dipped my feet in every single one, much to our group's chagrin. It was also part of the gold rush and is currently home to the world's largest/heaviest ingot, weighing in at 250kg (or about the average Japanese person's daily rice intake). We had the rest of the day off, which meant I could creep on the national team training. Sadly the sprinters were at the world cup but it was totes worth going because the pursuit squad was pulling off this badass change sequence. Maybe it's not THAT impressive but I was mesmerised.
The next day entailed my first Japanese lesson with Takuto-san, a resident baller and pilot of the national tandem champions duo. It was my turn to have my HR monitored during the sessions, which quickly turned into my favourite game - confuse the coach by not telling her I'm bradycardic. I was the only one who found this amusing as we do our intervals based on when the monitored athlete's HR drops below 125, which takes 3-4 minutes generally whereas mine does it in 40-45 seconds. I also happened to nab a selfie with @kazunariwatanabe (not featured, his MASSIVE haematoma) and it's remarkable how chilled and down to earth these pros are. There was actual cycling too, but I mentioned it last because me as a cyclist is definitely the lowlight of these updates, especially when I'm asked to do standing starts. I don't know if I just lack explosive strength or if I don't know how to ride a bike, but I legitimately can't do a satisfactory standing start. Or jump. So this is an open call for any feedback or advice you guys feel compelled to throw out there. #StandingStartsAreMyWorstEvent #ActuallyEveryEventIsMyWorstEvent #SeriouslyTho #HowAmISoBad #TrackToTokyo #Maybe #wymtm #FromWhereIRide #BeardGame
Captain's log, Days 3-4: My phone has contracted what I believe to be a digital variant of chlamydia (picture attached) hence the delayed update. We went to the famed Keirin school for power and fitness testing - basically seeing how we'd stack up to the average keirin school rider. Sidenote: Judging by the no girls allowed sign, I have a theory that the keirin school is actually the world's largest treehouse. Their testing rig is awesome and entails all kinds of hydraulic and electronic wizardry. The experience was beyond painful though, and I discovered, with the help of Shira-san, that my pedalling is ridiculously inefficient - I only transfer 40% of my power into propelling the bike forward. Moral of the story? I don't know how to ride and could be much much faster if I learned to pedal. But my raw numbers met or surpassed the requirements for entry, which means if I learn Japanese, I've got a shot at the Keirin School! But first I need to learn how to spin the pedals. Totally open to guidance here guys. Please note the juxtaposition of a high end display (and general measurement gadgetry) with an old school desktop setup running Windows ME. I love it. Also, apparently my right hand has 4kg more grip strength than my left. I don't know what to do with this information but I've taken to using my chopsticks with my left hand in hopes of rectifying this imbalance.
People here aren't used to yelling "Up Up Up" so everyone found it hilarious that I was cheering the other riders on during their tests. But it caught on and by the end, the riders' grunts were drowned out by everyone else shouting "Up!". The Chinese coach actually asked me to come cheer one of his riders on while I was cooling down because I had the loudest voice. #HeartsAndMinds #TrueDiplomacy #SeriouslyTho #TeachMeToPedal #IMakeYouFoodInReturn #DAMNbidextrous #TrackToTokyo #OrTheKeirinSchool #BeardGame #FromWhereIRide #wymtm
Captain's log, Day 2: First training session at the Izu Velodrome, which is where the 2020 track events will be held. I would say it's a fairly fast track but tbh I have no idea wtf I'm talking about, and with my times, the track is the last factor in my results . Really interesting lecture on pedalling dynamics and general bike positioning though (if anyone knows any good track specific bike fitters, please get me in touch with them because my shit is ALL kinds of messed up). Half the class fell asleep, although it might have had more to do with the fact that AM was 4x f500s with 10mins between reps and PM was 6x ss125s. Let the record show, the Thai guy who stomped me in the 125s didn't do 500s in the morning so he had fresh legs (at least that's what's helping me sleep tonight). As per my story, the Pakistan flag flew in a Japanese velodrome for the first time ever, which was pretty win. Btw, current World Sprint Champion @dmitrievden told me not to give up on my dream and complimented my beard, so yeah, that's a thing that happened. The only thing harder than trying not to look derpy and starstruck in that selfie is eating clams with chopsticks. How?! #IGenuinelyDontKnowWhatToHashtag #EveryDayFeelsLikeTheBestDayEver #ExceptWhenIGetMyTimes #ThoseSuck #TrackToTokyo #BeardGame #wymtm #FromWhereIRide
Captain's log, Day 1: The discipline and structure here is humbling. Beyond the typical regimented meals and training, I love the appreciation for things we tend to take for granted - lining up to greet the guard at the velodrome and thanking the track when you're done. The academy is pretty much in the shadow of Mt Fuji, which makes breakfast a delight. I'm mildly disappointed we don't get to sleep on the floor but that's easily remedied. The emphasis on classroom sessions to complement actual on-the-bike work is much appreciated, especially as there's an air of mystery surrounding the methodology. Also, Kato-san, the 74 year old former vice principal of the Keirin School not only adjusted my position on the bike but offered me personalised feedback and advice on my sprinting form after every effort. #WhichPrettyMuchMadeMyLife #NoReallyICanDieHappyNow #ISwearHeLikesMeMoreThanThatPhotoSuggests #AlsoTheFoodIsAMAZING #StillDontEnjoyThrowingItUpAfterAnEffort #PutTheHAMinHamza #TrackToTokyo #wymtm #FromWhereIRide #BeardGame #Japan
Pretty stoked at the chance to wear national colours in a second sport.
Thank you all for making the dream possible, and Haroon General for making it happen.
#KindaWantToWearItToTheAirport #SorryNotSorry #IWonderWhatThePolicyOnLycraIs #ProbablyIndecentExposure #LookOutJapan #TeamHamza #ItsAWorkInProgress #TakingSuggestions
#TrackToTokyo #wymtm #FromWhereIRide #TrackCycling
#TransformationTuesday 6 months ago, I was losing C's races by seconds. Last weekend I won my first ever indoor race in the B's.
#StillAlmostPeedMyselfWhenHeFlickedUpTheTrack #DesperatelyNeedTacticalCoaching #WillYouTeachMeToSprinting #wymtm #FromWhereIRide #TrackToTokyo #GlasgowGP | @animhoti
Pro tip: If you keep your pen super organised, people will think you're a much better cyclist than you really are. #AndThenYouCanLetThemDown #SlowestRiderOnTheTrack #MildltObsessiveCompulsive #wymtm #FromWhereIRide # Glasgow GP That @casco_official helmet tho And those @black_line_sprinting straps.