Tad personal, but mostly here as: tarot reader | flower essences/plant spirit medicine practitioner 🌀👁👐🏼💐 | NYU Social Work & Core Energetics | QNS/NJ
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Wow wow wow, where do I begin? Two weeks ago I had a reading myself with my friend and teacher @bakaraw, and as always it was very powerful, but there was something more medicinal, profound, and groundbreaking so-to-speak about that reading. Not only was it the message, but the way in which it was also delivered to Bakara herself - a lesson for her also. I just had that exact same experience reading for a wonderful, local Astorian woman, feeling smacked in the face with the lessons myself, for my own situation. They say that every reading you give is a reading for yourself, but I’ve never experienced it to this extent before. And after that, I turned on Pandora’s 90s pop station and the perfect song played to sum up the reading/situations! ♀️ Just goes to show how spirit places mirrors for you everywhere to reflect back to you your growth, blocks, and ultimately the lesson/medicine you need in every given moment. Feeling immense gratitude this New Moon in Pisces afternoon.
Beware the ides of March: Daughter/Page of Swords is my card for the month, and in many ways she is like the soothsayer in Shakespeare's Julius Caesar warning us of harm to come...this time due to my own fears, self-conscious withholding, and unintentional, self-inflicted paralysis. I have so much to say about her and how this reflects within me right now, and yet cannot find the words to tell you. Part of it is fear and shame of being truly vulnerable with you, IG fam (Are we friends? Is this community real? Can I trust you to hold space for me without judgment?) and part of it is that I am still processing daily how her medicine is affecting me (Also, wtf is her medicine? Do I even recognize it? Am I heeding her warning signs?). Suffice it to say, it's been a challenging #Pisces season, even for me with a moon in Pisces. I am over this long-ass, never-ending mid-Winter. Done diving into the depths of my shadows. I am ready for action, but the Daughter of Swords watches, waits patiently, and reacts cautiously. Wish I could tell you more, but it's back to surrender and careful observation (minus the perfectionism and anxiety) I go.
I really do believe things happen for a reason, and meeting with Ali and his partner tonight is an example of that. The snow day derailed our plans last night, but it is no coincidence that we found time for each other tonight before their 6 AM flight tomorrow and a lot of back and forth trying to arrange plans, when is Dillon coming back to NYC, etc. So grateful for grad school friends and like-minded/hearted community.
When my selfie says something funny like, “I don’t wanna be a player no more...” and Spirit responds with, “Bitch, yous a liar.” 🤨 This is basically a before and after with my tarot teacher and friend @bakaraw, laying the smackdown on having the courage to stay the course and in my heart even though I want to END IT ALL, cuz what comes after all of this is exactly what I’ve been working towards all along. fucking Bakara and Core Energetics I hate you both #notaplayerijustcrushalot #cleanversion
A warm reminder for when you feel like settling (in anything, not just relationships). Don’t. Feel your longing unapologetically and dare to ask for what you want and need. Have the courage to be seen. Allow others to give to you, to meet you - and be open enough to receive it. Take a risk. Be vulnerable. Stay in your heart. I promise it is always worth it. You are always worth it.
I just realized that for years (years!) this is the song I listen to on rainy days only. So strange. I wonder what my unconscious mind is trying to tell me...also, peep the time stamp. ;) .
I will turn your face to alabaster
When you find your servant is your master
Oh, you’ll be wrapped around my finger
2nd new year’s resolution, next to more culture/performing arts concerts: fine dining (or just proper dining - app, main, side to share, drinks, dessert, post-dessert drinks, etc.). Doesn’t have to be bougie or expensive, just an experience. No cell phones or distractions, just good food and better company. Leggooooooo! #selfcare #presocialworkersalary #privatesectorlife #financelife #finedining #nyc #cardiByear #fuckwithmeandgetsomemoney inspired by @juliewongbandue and @global.loafer who both know how to do it up and appreciate a real fucking meal
When your devoted Buffy/Angel-fan friends come thru in the clutch. Who knew we were all #teenagewitches? And where/when is the next #Buffy trivia night? I’ve found my team. FYI/PSA: Buffy is on Hulu now, not Netflix. Let’s binge. 🧟♀️🧟♂️🧛🏼♀️🧛🏼♂️ #witch #tarot #buffy #angel #magic #90s #wicca #pagan #vampires #theWB #josswhedon #SMG
What could be better than learning embroidery with and reading tarot cards for fellow Astorian, Central Jersey girl, @rutgersu alumna, and all-around girl boss @totes_cricket_lalou in 24 hours? Nothing, duh. ♀️ Well, maybe also meeting @hatzumomo who is going to teach me how to sew on a machine again. I’m so grateful for all of the amazing people, work, and abundance these past few months (and 2018) have ushered into my life. #winning #doesanyonesaythatanymore? #idontcare P.S. This is all I have to show for what I’ve learned because I just dropped the needle onto my jute rug. #prayidontprickmyself
Eclipse season is no joke, but look at all I have to be thankful for: Judgement, daughter of cups, priestess of swords (meh, but there is medicine in her too), and Strength. Bring on the play, purpose, and power - all in quiet discernment, feminine vitality, and vulnerability. #motherpeace
Laissez le bon temps rouler! Fat Tuesday and Valentine’s Day vibes here. Rockin’ some of the beads that smacked me in the face at Mardi Gras, 2013. Shout out to my second fav US city, New Orleans. I’m glad I payed a visit to my girl Mary at St. Pat’s yesterday cuz it’s ON today! Need me some @donutdivany King Cake from @queenscomfort though. And where are the second line parades in NYC? #NOLA #neworleans #mardigras #magick #energy #vibes #creole #south #louisiana #fattuesday #valentinesday
If every reading one gives is also a reading for oneself, then readings for fellow social workers are the besttttt ♀️. But guys, how am I already burned out after one year...of grad school!? I’m not even a social worker yet!!! the antidote is: balance (shout out to Justice card)? No dying on the altar of social justice, but a healthy mix of social work, private clinical practice, and maybe research/teaching (and dancing, singing, traveling, playing my flute, getting out in nature, magick, etc.... ). We shall seeeee. Who wants to pay back my and my client’s student loans? NYU and Columbia aren’t cheap to do the people’s work, homies. finally, tonight a Core group member processed exactly this...she is a burnt out psychologist and her work was exactly the medicine I needed. In awe, always. The universe always answers, if you can stop long enough to listen.
Because this week has been so trying emotionally, I disciplined myself to pull a card at the end of each day to ground. Those who know me know how difficult this is for me to do (y tho? ), but as a 11/2 life-path number, 2018 is my Renaissance year, sooooo I’m going hard these days. The Magician is my card for the month of February , but all of the others have been my cards of the day for the last five days; with the exception of the Two of Cups which answered a specific question.
I was trippin allllll DAY today. This week has been so long for no reason. It’s been emotionally high and low and I don’t know why. So, to calm myself I decided to take my ass to the conference room and pull a card. I was brought to motherfuckin tears (as tarot sometimes does), cuz she was like bih, what’s your problem??? 🤨🧐 your life is so good, whatchu buggin for? And immediately, it was over just like that. I felt better instantly. 180 turnaround in a freaking pull of a card. I’m always impressed by how quickly energy can shift and how we don’t have to be powerless to it. Take a deep breath, center yourself, and shift. Ta da.
My card for February, 2018 is The Magician. I could not be more thrilled as I've witnessed the power of my manifestation explode in these past few months. I've also been seeing hundreds everywhere (100, 200, 300, 400, 500, 700, 900, 1000, 1100, 1200, 1300, 1400, 1500, 1600, 1700, 1900, etc.), reminding me of my connection to my spirituality and my need to strengthen it through meditation (and perhaps a new deck of Rider-Waite cards). After a challenging last year, I am relieved to see The Magician show up, encouraging me to ask for what I want and need. What are you going to ask for this month? Can you state your need? Ask, and be willing and open enough to receive.
It was a warm enough night to stand out on the balcony last night. I love you, Winter, but I am ready for Spring. It feels like fucking January 74th (thanks @zamnmatty for the meme). How do you show yourself love and care? For me, it’s almost always music and dance, or sound healing. ♀️