Ramika

I'm a real woman with real responsibility... this is a look into my life...

2,156 posts 227 followers 629 following

Today marks 1 year since losing you. I never thought that I would know such a pain. I've gone this year never forgetting you and your sisters never forgetting you. I find myself at times not mentioning you because of the pain it brings saying "I have 3 kids", but your big sister Taylor always reminds me "No mommy you have 4 kids, don't forget about Malachi". I put on a smile and tell her thanks but it hurts so much. I feel deep pain that my womb wasn't fit to keep you, that my genes did not make you whole. I'm sorry my stress held you back and inability to handle it all took you away. My heart beats with you in mind sometimes wishing it was me not you. I pray you are watching and know that I love you so much. I LOVE YOU MALACHI! I love you my son! "Lord now I pray give me strength, let me just make it through the day. Let me not feel ashamed of the life growing inside me now because of the life that didnt make it. Cover me with your mercy for I have made mistakes. Take this pain away and make me whole again. I trust in you God and will follow your lead. I am listening, tell me what to do! I need you now Lord. I need to be held God in your arms. Your daughter is slipping away hiding under smiles and giggles, hiding behind volunteer hours and schoolwork. I am alone and overwhelmed I am lost with a light that shines so bright! What do I do and where do I go from here. Please lord heal my heart. In your precious son Jesus name, Amen."

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Breakfast for a Queen

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I did some baking with the @DonFisherClub house kids this week for #MiddleSchoolNight We made #SavoryDonuts
Shown we have Zucchini Bread donuts with Cream Cheese glaze
Pizza donuts
And
Jalapeño and Cheddar donuts
It was a fun experience!

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The girls last Sunday before church! #Sisters #ChurchGirls #Naturalhair #BraidsAndBuns #Braids

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She was so juiced to get that tooth out all on her own, she just had to share it with y'all.
I apologize ahead of time if it grosses you out lol
#Toothfairy
#BigGirlStatus

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Somebody was feeling they self!

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Oldie but goodie

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This month is supposed to bring out the thankfulness but it brings back so much pain. I lost my son 2 days before Thanksgiving and felt I had nothing to be thankful for, but I did God answers prayers, and I prayed for a son. And I was blessed with Malachi even if only for a moment. I was able to hold him and carry him in my womb! I am blessed!
Malachi is not forgotten and will forever be apart of this family!
#WeLoveYouMalachi
#MalachisMemory

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The effect of the kids menu

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She ate it all #Hungry #NoLeftovers

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Taylor's hair is ready for a week of swim. Shes in the water 3 days out the week!
#LittleMermaid #Swim
#Sundays #ChurchReady #PraiseHim
#BraidsAndBuns

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Saturdays are #WashDay for my girls so they get a #NewDo on Sundays
Here is Nelly's #Braids

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#Heeeyy my greatest accomplishments they have so much personality you gotta love em'

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#Kisses Taylor Wasn't ready

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Trick or treating with #MyLoves

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My CowGirl and Garden Fairy #MyLoves

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Her school celebrated #FallBirthdays Happy birthday to all the fall babies!

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She's such a good friend

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#TaylorGang
My little Garden fairy flying through the neighborhood!

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She grabbed me so quick...
"Mommy let's take a picture"

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She always stayed in character

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My little Garden Fairy at her school parade.
She was so beautiful!

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Had to keep it out of her face

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Today's style

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One head down and 2 more to go we will see how long this night is
#WashDay
#SteamStraightened
#TeamNatural
#Naturalistas
#NaturalKids
#MomDuties

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