97% of the time I'm a bluenose pit named Chase, but when I'm being exceptionally weird I go by Carl. (🏠: NYC & NJ) ✉️

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two ways to look at this. you can complain about the snow, or be grateful for this FASHION. MOMENT.


do not tell my parents but i know what B-A-T-H spells and i am not here for it.


suuuper convenient that #stpittiesday falls on the same day as #stpattysday, huh?



100% definitely did not scooch both of my beds in front of this closed door that currently has a person inside. #nope #iwouldnever


the ONLY and i mean only reason i get up in the morning is for couch hangs with dad, his coffee, and the @todayshow. this week we’re trying @swellcoffeeco_’s coffee subscription box, and the humans give it two (caffeinated) thumbs up! #ad #aintlifeswell


don’t get me wrong i’m happy you guys are home from vacation but. can I go back to my friends’ houses now?



moments away from applying for permanent residency at the @lilybug_lpb household. hopefully @lilybug_lpb doesn’t need to sign off on it 🤔😆


two 70-lb pitbulls walk into an #oscars party and....... that’s it. literally nothing happens. #lifeoftheparty #exceptnot (📷: @marisagrimshaw @lilybug_lpb)


mom & dad are off to FL for a week without me BUT i get to spend the week with @lilybug_lpb so WHO’S THE REAL WINNER HERE?! (it’s me ✋🏼.) head over to @lilybug_lpb to keep up with the #carlbug staycation!



TREAT YOURSELF and another heavy-headed dog in need! from now through 3/3, for every bag of @bark treats bought in @target stores or online, @bark will donate a bag of treats to a rescue org. to get your treat on and give back 👉🏼 #dogsofBARK #bark4palentines #ad


oooooo ok so ‘carl let’s go for a walk’ is really ‘carl come with us to pick up sushi OF WHICH WE WILL GIVE YOU NONE!!!’ #rudeness


👆🏼 accurate representation of how cooperative i am when mom reeeeallly wants a good photo. (snazzy new collar is from our real-life friends and @mrbonesandco advocates, @allkupets. everything is 30% off right now with code HELLOSUNSHINE, get it!)



if i had any secrets to tell i’d for SURE be whispering them in @bettythebostonb’s ears.


~morning vibes~ (virtually identical to any-time-of-the-day vibes, i know)


(VERY DELAYED) PUPDATE: blitzen is officially adopted!!! as of like, many weeks ago 😬. little man now goes by BOONE, and lives in CT with his forever parents, Ben and Ashley, who are positively obsessed with him. they’ve learned that Boone is SUPER smart, appreciates his daily morning cuddles, and loves the house’s upstairs carpet so much that he tries to bring everyone up there to play 😂. best part? you can follow Boone’s adventures at @heyboonedog! happy life to you, sweet reindeer pup! ❤️ @mrbonesandco #adoptblitzenmbc #adoptreindeerpupsmbc



mom starts with M. masseuse starts with M. i see no difference.


we quickly discovered. APPLESAUCE WAS A BAD IDEA. #pibbleswhonibble #guessitsbathnight


thanks for all the party invites but i clock out at 6 PM on saturdays.



thought i carried all of my weight in my brain but it seems the jowls are really pulling me down these days.


y'all think dogs sniffing each other's butts is weird when you're over here screaming over some little wooden blocks #🤔


FIND YOUR BEACH except the beach is in brooklyn and there is no tiki bar and wait is this even really a beach?


do not tell dad that this is his towel.


so mom i’m not sure if you know this but it is actually illegal to go to work when there is a pibble noggin resting on your couch arm. (ps. #boop)


name me ONE SCENARIO where beauty > comfort. (btw if you name one scenario we can still be friends but know that i will judge you intensely.)


someone better scoop this peanut up FAST before she permanently barnacles herself to carl’s body 😮. we got to babysit CUPID (blitzen’s sister!) this weekend while her foster parents were out of town, and oh man is she precious. we can’t believe that this little lady is the last of the reindeer pups still looking for a home! if you’re in NJ/CT/PA/NY and have an existing dog in the home (she needs it for socialization purposes), apply to adopt at 👉🏼 #adoptcupidmbc #adoptreindeerpupsmbc @mrbonesandco


don’t tell the seaworld seals, but i am coming. for. their jobs. #auditiontape #carrotsnotfish


one of these fine gentlemen started a trial adoption this weekend!!! (hint: the big derpy potato is still with us and says he’s never leaving 😬.) we’ll share another update once we have one — in the meantime SWIPE to see blitz’s cute lil noggin! #adoptblitzenmbc #adoptreindeerpupsmbc


had to get a foster so it wouldn’t seem weird that we have two dog beds 🤷🏼‍♀️ #adoptblitzenmbc


are puppies the epitome of little brothers, or what? meet our newest foster, BLITZEN!! we’re already smitten with this little mush, and he’s kiiinda obsessed with chase. blitzen is one of five @mrbonesandco reindeer puppies, and he and his sisters are all up for adoption — head to @mrbonesandco or #adoptreindeerpupsmbc for info! lots more blitz on stories, and story highlights so you can watch them forevaaaaaa. #adoptblitzenmbc #adoptdontshop


hello is this too much elegance to bring into 2018 Y/N