Kernel The Great

DOB 7/15/16, 145lbs 👶🏼| clumsy lap cow 🐮| service dog x canine good citizen in-training 😇| boston 🌇| @alyssabphotography 🙋🏻| alyssa@alyssabphoto.com 💌

http://alyssabphoto.com/

235 posts 54,884 followers 178 following

(🔊 4 CUTE KERNIE SNEEZE) CATCH ME IF YA CAN LIKE THE GINGERBREAD MAN!! -Biggie🎄DEAR DIARY, MORE PUPPERS ARE JOINING THE WAGNIFICENT PACK SOON, SO I’M LOVING MY INTIMATE DATES WITH OLIVE WHILE THEY LAST❤️ #CouplesGoals #ChaperonedByMother #ThxMommy #KerniesGotAGirlfriendddd #OrFifty #PlayOnPlayer 😇 @jennygreenwold

102💬

I NEED A GIRL WHO’S AS SWEET AS A DOVE, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I SEE, I NEED LOVE @llcoolj 😍💋HONORED TO HAVE MY GIRLFRIEND, OLIVE, AS OUR FURST CLIENT/HIKER AT WAGNIFICENT!! WE HAD AN AMAZING TIME AND THEN I FELL ASLEEP FOR THE NIGHT AT 2PM! 😂ARE U GONNA COME HIKING WITH US?!! @jennygreenwold

116💬

GREATNANA IS NINETY AND THUGGER THAN U 👵🏻
“GREW UP IN THE GHETTO” AND YEP SHE’S A JEW 👵🏻
A DRILL SERGEANT PASSING DOWN OLD FAMILY RECIPES 👵🏻
CUZ PERFECT BANANA BREADZ A FLUFFIN’ NECESSITY #DearNana #YouAreAppreciated #TupacShaKern🐄👶🏼

306💬

Loading...

FRESHER THAN A PILLOW WITH A MINT ON IT #ExtremelyFresh #IdPopMyCollar #ButImNAKED @champagnepapi ❄️ THIS MORNING WAS THE FIRST SNOW! WE WUZ ALL FILLED WITH HAPPY!! 🙃⛄️

180💬

‼️BOSTONIANS, READ‼️
WE SHOULD GET JERSEYS, CUZ WE MAKE A GOOD TEAM 🐾 BUT YOURS WOULD LOOK BETTER THAN MINE, CUZ YOU’RE OUTTA MY LEAGUE ❤️ AND I KNOW THAT IT’S SO CLICHE TO TELL YOU THAT EVERYDAY I SPEND WITH YOU IS THE NEW BEST DAY OF MY LIFE 🐾 EVERYONE WATCHING US JUST TURNS AWAY WITH DISGUST ❤️ IT’S JEALOUSY, THEY CAN SEE THAT WE’VE GOT IT GOIN’ ON!@relientk 🐶🐕🐩🐄 CALLING LOCAL K9’S!!! HIKE W/ MOTHER AND ME AT OUR NEW COMPANY, WAGNIFICENT - NOW OFFERING MENTALLY & PHYSICALLY STIMULATING OFF LEASH HIKES TO FRIENDLY DOGS W/GOOD RECALL, LIVING NEAR THE ROUTE FROM BRIGHTON TO CAT ROCK PARK. 😍#BitchMyMomHave2Businesses #WagsOnWagsOnWags #ShopSmallLiveLarge

112💬

THROW ME A FRICKIN’ BONE, HERE!! -Dr. Evil 😈🍗 I CRACKED UP THE PEANUT GALLERY WHILE DISCOVERING AUSTIN POWERS #OhBehave #GroovyBaby!! 🤓 DON’T JUDGE MY TREE, MOTHER CAN’T GET MOST OF THE LIGHTS ON #ImperfectMeImperfectTree #ButFixItNow #OrElse 🤬🎄

148💬

Loading...

POINT THA BIGGEST SKEPTIC OUT I’LL MAKE HIM A BELIEVER!! @champagnepapi☝🏾🎅🏾#SweetButTwisted #Doppleganger #AVeryKernieChristmas

120💬

I’LL MAKE YOU SMILE FOR THE SIMPLE FACT I’M GOOD AT IT, I’LL MAKE YOU SMILE JUST SO I CAN SIT AND LOOK AT IT @atmosphere 🙃#SmileFurMeKernie #LemmeSeeYaJowls #BornWeirdStayedWeird 🤪

183💬

🔊YOU HAVE TO GET ME A CHRISTMAS PRESENT. IT SAYS SO IN THE BIBLE. #facts -lucy @peanutsmovie 🎅🏻 LOVELY EVENING DECORATING @romobsiegel & @mattyinthemorning’s TREE AND DOING SOME CASUAL MODELING!🙎🏿‍♂️🎄🙎🏼‍♂️#willwork4cookiez #feliznavidog

96💬

Loading...

FELIZ NAVIPAWD, FELIZ NAVIDOG, FELIZ NAVIDAD, PROSPERO AÑO Y FELICIDAD!! 🎅🏻🎄THIS IS MY FURST (AND LIKELY LAST 👿) TIME ATTENDING ONE OF MOTHER’S PHOTO GIGS. I WAS V GOOD BUT MY “PRESENCE WAS A DISTRACTION” 😤!! Thanks to @j0hanac for inviting me and modeling my @loveyourmelon beanie. Love Your Melon donates half of all proceeds to pediatric cancer!!! What a wholesome gift to give this year. TYSM to campus rep @sassyysyd and @uablymcrew for the beanie!! ❤️

107💬

WHAT’S UR NAME? I’M LIL KERN 🙋🏼‍♂️WHERE U FROM? BEANTOWN IN THE ‘BURBS 🙋🏼‍♂️ WHO’S UR CRUSH? SHE MY VET🙋🏻‍♀️PLAYS ME LIKE A GUITAR FRET🎸I’M OUTTA CONTROL, WANNA LOVE ‘EM ALL 🙋🏼‍♂️ EVEN THE DR. THAT CHOPPED OFF MY BALLS #TheKernieRap 🏀 FURREAKED THE FURREAK OUT WHEN MOTHER SAID IT WAS TIME FOR THE VET!! I LOVE INVESTIGATING THE SNIFF OUTTA THAT PLACE AND THEY TREAT ME LIKE A ROYAL PRINCE!🤴🏿ILY @britbaldvmd AND ALL OF @VCA Rotherwood 💜TYSM to @bonedannas for the absolutely adorable Boston sports bandanas! ⚾️

141💬

WHERE THERE IS A WILL, THERE IS A WAY, TO SEARCH AND DISCOVER A BETTER DAY✨WHERE A POSITIVE HEART IS ALL YOU NEED TO RISE BEYOND AND SUCCEED ✨WHERE YOUNG MINDS GROW AND RESPECT EACH OTHER, BASED ON THEIR DEEDS AND NOT THEIR COLOR ✨ WHEN TIMES ARE DIM, SAY AS I SAY, “WHERE THERE IS A WILL, THERE IS A WAY” #TupacAmaruShakur #TheRoseThatGrewFromConcrete #RestInPimp #MissYouForevs 💙

96💬

Loading...

TMZ TAKIN’ PICTURES CAUSIN’ MAD HYSTERIA, MOMMA SEE ME ALL OVER IG AND START TEARIN’ UP @asapferg 😉👑 Tag a friend who would love the amazingness that is @popyourpup! I adore what they made for me!! #ad

336💬

FORGIVE BUT DON’T FORGET, KEEP YA HEAD UP, YOU DON’T NEED HIM ✨AND I AIN’T TRYIN’ TO GAS YOU UP, I JUST CALL ‘EM HOW I SEE ‘EM ✨SINCE WE ALL CAME FROM A WOMAN, GOT OUR NAME FROM A WOMAN AND OUR GAME FROM A WOMAN ✨ I WONDER WHY WE TAKE FROM OUR WOMEN, WHY WE RAPE OUR WOMEN - DO WE HATE OUR WOMEN? ✨ I THINK IT’S TIME TO KILL FOR OUR WOMEN, TIME TO HEAL OUR WOMEN, BE REAL TO OUR WOMEN✨ IF WE DON’T WE’LL HAVE A RACE OF BABIES THAT HATE THE LADIES THAT MAKE THE BABIES ✨AND SINCE A MAN CAN’T MAKE ONE, HE HAS NO RIGHT TO TELL A WOMAN WHEN AND WHERE TO CREATE ONE ✨ SO WILL THE REAL MEN GET UP? I KNOW YA FED UP, LADIES, BUT KEEP YA HEAD UP #RestInPimp2Pac #TheRoseThatGrewFromConcrete🌹 TYSM to @udog_training for the collar!

120💬

DOGGIEZ IS MAD I GET MORE BUTT THAN ASH TRAY -biggie 😎🍑 shoutout to my new fan @whatupcal from @timefliesmusic, love your raps! 💕

86💬

Loading...

YOU DON’T HAVE BAD LUCK. THE REASON BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO YOU IS CUZ YOU’RE A DUMBASS. NOW FIX IT!! -Red Forman 😉Wild moments on @officialmauryshow when the DNA test proved Deyonte was NOT the father of 1y/o twins that he and Tokhara were raising!! #mmhmm #datshitcray 🤭👀

104💬

SUNSHINE, SUNSHINE IT’S FINE, I FEEL IT IN MY SKIN, WARMIN’ UP MY MIND, SOMETIMES YOU GOTTA GIVE IN TO WIN, I LOVE THE DAYS WHEN IT SHINES, WOAH LET IT SHINE @atmosphere🌻🌞

115💬

I COULDA GONE TO SCHOOL TO BE A DOCTA, BUT I DROPPED OUT AND CHOSE TO BE A BALLA @raesremmurd🖤Horrifying moment after cuddling w/my @cuddleclones named CuddleColonel, when his GHOST CAME ALIVE TO COPY ME, V CONFUSED. 🧐🤷🏼‍♂️
Dear DevilDiary, another note from noise complaint lady. Appawrently my zoomies were “like thunder” and her cat peed on her while she slept. Mah b. #vvsry #catsvsdogs 😈

293💬

Loading...

I DON’T WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAS, THERE IS JUST ONE DOG I NEED🎄I DON’T CARE ABOUT THE PORK CHOPS GRILLIN’ OUT ON THE BARBIE🔥 I JUST WANT YOU FOR MY OWN, MORE THAN A FRESH MEATY BONE 🍖 MAKE MY WISH COME TRUE, ROMO ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAAAOAOAOAS IS YOOOOUUHHHH!! #StartedAsBrothers #NowWereGayLovers @mariahcarey 🎂 HBD to @romobsiegel’s humom, Maryann the Great, cuz she birthed Romo (i think?), unofficially adopted me and mother, and she loves Tupac!! That’s our 2017 Woman of the Year #mazeltov🏆 TYSM to @hudson_goldenpup for the adorable fan art! 💜

57💬

I JUST WANNA LEARN AND I WANNA GROW. I WANNA CONSUME AS MUCH INFORMATION AS POSSIBLE. I WANNA BE GREAT! @kidcudi #SmartIsSexaaay 🤓🧠 Love this feature from my beautiful pawtner, @thedodo! Some comments left on their page have me wanting to clarify...
1. I’m a task trained PTSD service dog to MOTHER ONLY. I’m more than an Emotional Support Dog because I’m trained to work.
2. I plan to be a therapy dog and help OTHERS in the future. I once practiced in “The Bingo Room” at a rehab where I greeted like 35 people without touching anyone’s bingo chips!!
3. According to @servicedogproject and @neadsdogs, PTSD is the only qualifying psychiatric disability for a service dog in an otherwise healthy handler.
4. Mother and I have trained daily since I came home at 13w/o. I get lots of breaks, playtime, and exercise... duh, I’m a dog!
5. I am not “jumping” at any point in the video. That’s a CUED “gentle hug” (great command to teach jumpy dogs) and a small part of my service dog training.
6. Still can’t catch my tail wtf

324💬

THEY SAID I WON’T BE NOTHIN’ NOW THEY ALWAYS SAY KERNGRATULATIONS, WORKED SO HARD FURGOT TO CHERISH BACON, THEY AIN’T EVER HAD THE DEDICATION, PEOPLE HATIN’ SAY WE CHANGIN’ LOOK WE MADE IT, YA WE MADE IT🕺🏿🥓@postmalone AYYY DIOS MIO! ES KERNEL EN ESPAÑOL!!! MUCHAS GRACIAS @upsocl (on FB) POR LA PUBLICACIÓN DESTACADA!! #BesosYAbrazos💪🏿💪🏻

190💬

LAST CHRISTMAS I GAVE YOU MY HEART AND THE VERY NEXT DAY, I ATE A FILET, THIS YEAR I HOPE YOU SEND BEER, I’LL DRINK IT WITH SOMEONE SPECIALLLL 🥩🍺 @georgemofficial #FlashbarkFriday #KerniferHudson

317💬

BLESSINGS ON BLESSINGS ON BLESSINGS, LOOK AT MY LIFE, MAN, THAT’S LESSONS ON LESSONS ON LESSONS @bigsean ✨🖼️ #NoOneIsYou #ThatIsYourSuperPower #WizardOfPaws TYSM to @sniffandbarkens for the feature, get 10% off your BarkensBucket w/code “kernel” 💙💚

140💬

HALF BLACK LIKE DRAKE ‘N MY SHOWS AIN’T FREE 💎 THEY CALL ME KERNIE MO’FLUFFIN O.G💎 GIRLIES ALWAYS WANNA SMOOCH I’M LIKE YEA WUTEVA 💎 I ROCK A LEASH THAT’S GOLD LIKE CHEDDA 💎 A RHINESTONE KOWBOY, I’LL STEAL YA HEART 💎 YOUR GAME IS OVER WHEN I PRESS START #ohhhhh✌🏿✌🏻#KernelsFurstHitSingle #VoteForMyRapperNameBelow #TupacShaKern #KernyeWest #KerndrickLamar #WizKhernlifa #Kernie3000 #LilKern #NotoriouslyKuteB.I.G #WuTangKern 🧀🎧 TYSM to @sniffandbarkens for the amazing #barkensbucket! I loved it and if you love your dog, you’ll buy it one (YEA DOGS I GOT UR BACK). Save 10% w/code ”kernel” AND 10% of your order will be donated to @pilotsnpaws! #SaveTheChildren 🐾 TYSM to my adorable friend @missolivethedoodle for the bandana!! #PresentsRock #SendPresents 🎀

136💬

I KNOW IT’S EASY TO IMAGINE, BUT IT’S EASIER TO JUST DO, SEE, IF YOU CAN’T DO WHAT YOU IMAGINE, THEN WHAT IS IMAGINATION TO YOU? @kidcudi #DreamtIWasAUnikern #DreamWhileYoureWideAwake #BelieveYourDreams🦄🌈 I’m a very busy boy, even in my sleep. I am known to fall asleep standing upright and to tap dance/run/talk/bark/whimper in my sleep. Occasionally, I solve complex mathematical equations and global issues as well, just depends on my mood. 😂❤️🤷🏼‍♂️

217💬

BE YOUNG, BE DOPE, BE PROUD, LIKE AN AMERICAN! @lanadelrey 🇺🇸 TAG THE GREATEST VET YOU KNOW. I’LL START: MY FAVE VETERAN IS GREAT-PAPA, I LOVED BEING HIS GREAT-GRANDDANE. SWIPE TO SEE HIM ON DUTY IN WWII. 😘 AND MY FAVE VETERINARIAN IS MY SEXY CYBERDREAMVET @dr.evanantin #NoticeMe #LoveMe #DateMyMother💃🏻💋🕺🏻TYSM for the custom patriotic Ameripaw bandana @cliveandbacon!

131💬

CHILLIN’ OUT MAXIN’ RELAXIN’ ALL KOOL -@willowsmith’s Dad 😎#DreamBigDreamFierce #FlashbarkFriday #CalfsOfInstagram #EatMorChikin 🐄 SWIPE TO SEE MY RECOVERY. I FEELZ DESPAWRATE TO LIVE MY LIFE AGAIN. FAVE ACTIVITY RN IS CHASING MY BUBBLE #BubbleBoy -FORCED BEDREST DAY 3 of 21 🥀

243💬

🔊CRUSH A BIT LIL BIT, ROLL IT UP TAKE A HIT, FEELIN’ LIT FEELIN’ RIGHT, STILL HAVENT NOTICED MY BUTT FEELS LIGHT @kidcudi ft. WuTangKern 🙃🤷🏼‍♂️ PUPDATE: Still high AF, chomping away on ice cubes. Did you play “GUESS THE WEIGHT OF MY EX-BALLS?” The correct answer was 6.8oz! Flattered by those who guessed 6lbs, upset with those who guessed ~2oz. I’m a Great Dane, not a raisin (or a horse)!!! 😂❤️TYSM to @kongcompany for the teddys, toys, and soft recovery collars; so grateful to have a friend like you!!

199💬

🔊You look like you smell of honey and no pain, let me have a taste of that. 💛@rupikaur_ Thank you for all the well wishes. I am in recovery and on great drugs, dreaming about my beloved Cat Rock Park! I’ll keep my story updated xo 🐮 NOW IT’S TIME TO PLAY “GUESS THE WEIGHT OF MY EX-BALLS” IN THE COMMENTS, WINNERS WILL GET FEATURED IN MY STORY. #AlwaysInMyHeart #RIPballs 🎾🎾 bowtie collar by @happytailtrends blue collar by @finnandmecollection 🦋

622💬